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Well, well! I made it 42 years with no broken bones *YAY ME*, but it seems the first fracture has finally happened. *OWIE* And the really sad thing is: it didn’t even happen in a way I can brag about or be ‘proud’ of. *SUPER SAD FACE*

Two weeks ago today, as I was cleaning house, it happened! *INSERT DRAMATIC MUSIC* I was minding my own business, moving merily along performing my wifely/motherly duties, when all of a sudden it happened!  Out of the blue and completely unprovoked, the sofa chair decided to assault me! *THE NERVE* For no reason at all, that silly ole thing decided to attack me and in the process I came away with a broken – yep, you guessed it – TOE! *OWIE*

I’m really not quite sure my toe was acutally broken in this unseemly altercation with a lump of leather, but by all appearances it would seem so. The swelling that made my itty bitty appendage look more like a super-sized flipper than a toe was the first clue. The black and blue bruising that encircled my toe like the rings on a racoon tail was the second. And, last but not least, let us not forget about the PAIN! That was definitely clue number 3 that something more than stubbing had happened to one of my favorite phalanges! *IT WASN’T A PRETTY SITE*

Everyone I’ve ever known who suffered from a broken toe *NOW YOU SEE WHY MY FIRST BREAK IS NOTHING TO BRAG ABOUT. IT’S NOT LIKE I FELL OUT OF A TREE RESCUING A KITTY OR ANYTHING- SIGH* said the doctors did nothing for them except tell them to elevate it, ice it, and stay off it. From what I understand, there isn’t much that can be done for a broken toe. So, in my ‘wisdom’, I decided to save some $$$$$ and NOT go to the doctor. *SMART, RIGHT??*

Well, after two weeks, the bruising has subsided and the pain is minimal – until I try to put my foot in closed toed shoes. That was until LAST NIGHT!!! *ARGH* After getting my pinky toe stuck in my pants leg *AS IF THAT WEREN’T BAD ENOUGH*, I was walking through the living room and stubbed it AGAIN!! *DOUBLE OWIE* Pain is back!!!! Swelling is back!!!! So far though, no sign of ring around the toe. Not sure if I have refractured it. Well, not even sure it was fractured in the first place. But one thing I do know, IT HURTS. *TEARS*

Oh well, my first broken bone may not have a hero’s story attached to it but I wear it with pride all the same! It isn’t every day a mother and housewife tussles with an oversized lump of cow’s hide and wins – even if she does hobble away with a broken toe!!! *BIG SMILES*